Success blog; / Oct 23, 2015

Looking For LOVE


I remember the day like it was yesterday. Several years ago, I was a Spanish teacher and basketball coach at one of the local high schools. It was the 7th year of me coaching the girls’ basketball team, and for my last and final year, I decided to do a mentoring program for the girls. Within this program, my goal was to help them identify and overcome the challenges that they would face throughout their teenage, high school, and perhaps college years. There were many subjects discussed, but one that I want to share in this blog was the one on the subject of love.

I remembering asking the girls from the onset what exactly they thought love was. I received a number of responses which left me chuckling a bit as they discussed “their” definition of love. I remember one of the young ladies replying, “Coach, love is when your boyfriend buys you flowers and rides his bicycle to your house when he knows that it’s going to take him at least an hour to get there!” Another replied, “No, love is when they spend all their money on you so you can have what you need.” And yet another responded, “Love us when they’ll stay up all night on the phone and talk to you until you fall asleep.” I couldn’t help but smile as I remember those days for myself as well. As I was smiling, one of them asked, “Well coach….what IS love?? I don’t think any of us in here really knows!” My response to her was simple. I told them that I can only share with them the definition of love according to the word of God. I then showed them the scriptures 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7 which reads:

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

This is what we have to remember in our own lives…….whether we are looking for love, or already have someone in our lives. We have to do our best to always show them that we love them and they the same in return. How do we do that? We have to show patience when we don’t want to. We have to be kind when we want to shout, scream, or even fuss about something. We have to honor them as often as we can remember. We can never let pride come in between what God has ordained. Pride can bring relationships to a fall, but meekness and humbleness in a relationship will always cause it to go higher. Asking God to tame our tongues is also another way of showing love. Stop trying to go off about everything. The word of God tells us that love is not easily angered. If you’re keeping score or reminding your spouse of how many times they wronged you, then you’re not exemplifying the true love that God wants you to show. Stop keeping record of wrongs. Forgive and do your best to move forward… love!

Love doesn’t delight in doing evil. You should never want to hurt them or even want someone else to hurt them. That’s why domestic violence is NEVER the result of being loved too much, but it’s the result of them not loving you enough. So, if that’s you…use wisdom….get out while you still have time! Love protects, not hurts. Love always trusts, always hopes, and always perserveres.

When looking for love in a soul mate, as I explained to my girls in my mentoring program, you must be willing to NOT compromise in finding someone who will exemplify these qualities back to you. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t want to be loved, but in the process of finding it, use wisdom. Take heed to what the word of the Lord says, and I am sure that one day, you WILL find…..THE RIGHT KIND OF LOVE!

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